It's gonna be 2 am and goodness gracious, time flies so fast!
The way my body works is irritating. I wasn't that tired actually, but i took a short nap hoping to wake up like after an hour or so. But, i couldn't hear the alarm(although it can really annoy you fyi) and slept for like 4 and a half hours! And, i'm so freaking awake i bet i'll still doze off during chem lecture tmr because i'll still be sleepy nevertheless.
But that's not the point.
I think i'm living my jc life in vain. Although i've made very very good friends whom i'll really treasure, it was still an unfulfilled journey i think. I regret not joining any cca which i like or am really into in pj(not that there is even any significant one to start of with). I guess you'll win some, you'll certainly lose some.
Volleyball was such a fluke like i'm sure i played quite okay but the freaking senior was stupidly biased and didn't even look at the way paul and i played. wtf? It's not that she's superbly good either okay i'm disgusted.
I remembered paul and i went for tennis tryouts/trials. But we're such suckers we backed out after looking at the others who went too cos apparently they played well. Freak, i'm miffed at the fact that we didn't even try! ohmygod. why didn't i try at the very least! fff.
If only there's swimming i tell you i'll be the first on the list for trials!!!
I better get into swimminggg in uni or i'll just regret my whole life seriously.
Sigh, how i wish i didn't allow any fear or nervousness to control the decisions i made. Guess it's too lateeeeeeeee grr just concentrate on doing CIP geeeez. I think helping out at SPCA would be cool heehaw.
I've realised. Sometimes, when you've tried your hardest, the things that you want are still out of reach. Your hardest try is still not enough.
And, that's when life is a total bitch.
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3 comments:
hey.. i totally understand your feeling man. my volleyball trials were one big wreck too. like, he totally made us trial only to tell us only one of us of the lot will get chosen. wth? and dont talk about my other cca commitments that i tried to take on. i guess right now its no use thinking about the past anymore and focus on the a levels and whatever lies ahead. :) do it well ibro, i know you can. if you want to feel like you have accomplished something, a good a level cert can say alot!
yeah omg the vball seniors are such pssst. but at least you have project ican mannn. (: yeah you're right. there's n point brooding over the past cos we can't buy time back yes? thanks for the faith in me. i have confidence in you too bestie! (: let's work our ass off for As and GET As. cheers!
*no point
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